1 year of buyin' nothing new; next year - avoiding waste

Well, I've completed the year of buying nothing new. And despite what some might think, I didn't rush to the nearest store and buy something new. Rather, I realized all over again how satisfied I've been with the material goods I've got and have had for the past year (or longer). Of course it was a challenging experiment at times, negotiating gifts, body care products, and my "sustainable" mode of transportation which required the most bending of the commitment.

In summary, here are the things that I did end up purchasing new (not without grave contemplation):

-new bicycle helmet

-new bike tires

-new chain and cassette, twice

-new bike lube

-new pocket knife (mine sadly being forgotten on a beautiful NZ beach)

-new toothpaste (though I made plenty of my own homemade stuff too)

-new soap (made one batch from scratch!)

It seemed ironic how my sustainable mode of transport required many 'new' things that either didn't feel comfortable buying second hand, or just wasn't available second hand.

That being said, I am excited to buy new bike shorts. My current pair have been very well worn (ahem, since 2009 well worn).

It's been an exciting project and it really made me think a bit harder about every consumer purchase that I made, and I felt encouraged and determined to experiment with making my own body products and finding whatever gear I might need second hand. I often wondered if it would have been harder to buy nothing new for the year if I was living in one place.

That led me to consider the sustainability of a nomadic lifestyle, such as I've been living for the past year and half. Food choices that are made when I'm traveling immediately come to mind. Smaller quantities are more often bought, and they usually have more packaging. Purchasing smaller quantities also means that fruits and vegetables from farmers markets cannot be stockpiled and preserved in the way you can if you live in one spot. So food habits become a bit less sustainable on the road. Though, I always make a point of travelling with empty plastic bags to refill at bulk stores, and I seek out farmers markets in each new place that I visit. Not only is it a way to get delicious more sustainable food, but it is an experience of some of that places' culture. 

And modes of transportation are also less sustainable when you're traveling. Though I did chose to ride my bicycle most of the places I was exploring over the past year and half, I also took two massive flights across the pacific. Carbon debt for sure. But, whenever possible I chose trains, buses and of course my bike Poppy as a fulfilling alternative to flying over precious and interesting landscapes. Camping over the past year with all my gear packed aboard poppy meant that I became much more pleased with the simple needs of life. Food water, shelter, warmth. I didn't use nearly as much energy and water as I would have living in a house; less showers, more swimming!

So all this reflection and talk about sustainable living brings me to my next thought! What will I challenge myself with this year! Thoughts and brainstorms with my friends here on the west coast have revolved around food and around waste. After discussing with some friends recently in Victoria, we decided to watch the film The Clean Bin Project, a film we'd all heard of but never sat down to watch.

The couple in this documentary go a year without buying nothing new, and creating as little waste as possible, and they keep all their non-recyclable waste for the whole year! They end up with just a little bin of garbage each. Amazing! So, since completing my experimental year of buying nothing new, I now am going to start a year of collecting every bit of non-recyclable waste that I create, and avoiding that waste to begin with. Fun right? Anyone interested in having a bit of friendly competition with me? Whoever has the least amount of waste at the end of the year wins...?

Swollen Heart

The present is all we really know we've got. The only time we really know is for real. And so, now that I'm no longer on Cortes Island, as I process and reflect on what was: all the smells, sights, touches, emotions and deep seeded universal nudges that were felt during my time at Hollyhock, it nearly feels like a great dream, my month at Hollyhock. The kind that you remember well, even though it was experienced in the deepest longest sleep. 

It was a joyous dream, set in a magnificent location among age old trees, squealing eagles with 5 foot wing spans, where deer roam close, and apples fall from trees like the garden of Eden. Food is abundant and ever present, with much laughter, music and fellowship around. In my dream I learned to play the ukulele, I fell in love, over and over. I went within, I spread myself out. I meditated, practiced yoga, did selfless service, learned about Buddhism, stoicism, the hero's journey, the goddess and god in us all, the divine light, mindfulness.  In this 'dream' I cried a bit, felt lots of feelings, and I laughed a lot. My how great it is to laugh. 

After taking down and winterizing the entire Hollyhock site after the last workshop ended with the other volunteers and some staff, we hugged and waved goodbye to our Hollyhock family. I spent a few extra special days on Cortes with one of the other volunteers, cooking, eating, conversing and connecting, bike riding and walking near those beautiful big trees and that those beautiful and big trees. And then, I packed up my bicycle once again, loaded dear Poppy down. As I waved goodbye and felt tears spring to my eyelids, I let out a hoot and holler and cycled across Cortes Island to the ferry, and embarked on wards... 

Breathing in and out and with flashing memories coming into my brain of the dream that was the past month, I slowly pedaled Poppy through the cold rain to Courtenay. I'm now writing to you from Nanaimo, where I'm playing with some Otesha friends. I spent a night camping out near Cathedral grove, a beautiful stand of 800 year old fir trees, and in the frosty brisk air of the evening, as my friend and I were the only ones at the waterfall campsite where we set up home, we built a fire, made some soup and reveled in the simple happiness that camping brings. Waiting for the rainy days to bring sunshine, I'll leave for Victoria on Wednesday to continue visiting friends and exploring Vancouver Island by bicycle. 

A familiar head space; I once again am transitioning from one journey to another. I'm thinking about what my next months will bring, and largely, I'm still discovering what it means to listen deep; to tune right into my heart and speak my truth and make my decisions; for I do believe that listening to the heart centre is what will lead to happy life. 

I'll leave you with a poem which I found buried in the depths of my entertainment bag (I've carried this ziploc bag of journals, pencil crayons, embroidery thread, glue, scrap paper etc. for the past year and a half - a necessity for me while travelling). I wrote it one stormy day in Sydney last January: 

learning, growing
maybe
stifling energy, but greatly
free
move like the wind blows
across the barren field
move with bravery, courage
and to open
to listen deep
to what the universe holds
heart swollen

Right

I stand staring at the ocean, with a sturdy long piece of driftwood in my hand. As I look at the horizon, I scan eastbound toward the snow capped west coast mountains clearly visible on this morning. I breathe a breath out, and feel a grave sense of calmness wash over me.

I turn my gaze downward, to the moist squishy sand of low tide that my blue crocs slowly sink into. I begin by carving a cross into the sand with a half circle and a dot in each of the four quadrants. The dot looks like an eye observing me, and the half circles look like the moon that's been barely visible behind clouds these past few days, as it waxes toward the fullness of itself.

Slowly and methodically I bring the lines to join each point of extension together in large convex arches toward the ocean, beginning to see the cross, half moons, and eyes turn into a unified creation of a labyrinth.

I learned how to draw labyrinths in the sand from my dear friend Jally during my time in Australia. To Jally, the act of drawing and walking the labyrinth has been a great source of calm meditation, contemplation, awareness and presence over her years of walking the labyrinth as a daily meditation. Since she shared how special this ritual was to her, and after I had the chance to experience what it is like to walk this sacred, ritualistic, historic and culturally significant path, I have felt how special these paths are. A symbol of a pilgrimage, a chance to twist and turn, always knowing that you are on the path, the correct one, and losing track of the outside world, the labyrinth invites you to go within and contemplate a question, speak your truth, or just let go of it all. 

This particular morning, after spending 24 days here at Hollyhock, the labyrinth felt stronger as I slowly walked the path towards the centre, and back out again. I've experienced much over the past days here at Hollyhock. I've met some really interesting people, connected so specially with my fellow karma yogis. As I shared in a recent talking circle, that we have each week in the Sanctuary, (a special, grounding, sacred cob structure here at Hollyhock), there are these little bottles inside me. They look like medicinal potion bottles, and there are a few of them, filled with different coloured potions. Since being here at Hollyhock, some of these little bottles have had their corks slowly pulled off, and have been nudged by the universe, so that the colourful potions of emotions, feeling, and awareness, have sloshed over the edge. It's put me in a very amazing but very vulnerable place.   

One of these little bottles spilled completely over this morning, during my walk of the labyrinth. Pink beautiful liquid flowing out, spilling out, washing over me, and spreading onto the sand, and out into the universe, away from me. 

And it felt so good. 

I've shared a lot with people here over the past 24 days. They've shared a lot with me too. A number of themes continue to come up in conversations, in books I pick up, and in presenters and workshops that I encounter at Hollyhock: mindfulness, presence and being aware of the moment you are in. Feeling all my feelings deeply, because I'm allowed to feel whatever is real in my heart, and it is indisputable. Seeking my truth, my true self, learning to listen to that truth, and always speaking it with strength, power and vigor; let my actions follow from my true self. Letting go of the uncontrollable is a valuable practice that immediately brings such peace within - and happiness too. The divine essence resides within each of us, we are all full of this divine light, and so we all have an innate organic connection with one another - amazing! These are just some of the themes, lessons, and conversations I've been having with folks here. There's been oh so much more...

The bundle of energy that is Andria, our volunteer coordinator, meditated on our group and a phrase came to her that she feels resonated with our group purpose or mission during our time here: Inspiration into Action. So I've been thinking about that a lot as well, curious how that looks for me

The amount of love I've been receiving and giving is so magnificent. Other emotions I've been wading through are gratitude, joy, love, fear, vulnerability, confusion, judgement, anger, love, support, fullness, wonder, awe, curiosity, knowledge, and more love, love, love.

As the full moon grows near, I know time has passed and that I will cherish the moments and days I have left here at Hollyhock. It will come time to move on from here, and it will all happen perfectly, just like its suppose to. 

After all, I'm in the right place, at the right time, having the right conversation with the right people.

On purpose?

Are you living in the place you belong, with the people you love, doing the right work, on purpose?

A (loaded) question that was asked at the evening presentation form a workshop facilitator here at Hollyhock who is running a multiday series titled "Repacking Your Bags: Lightening your load for the good life". A really very interesting slew of thoughts and ideas and conversations have been coming up for me over this past first week since I arrived at Hollyhock...

But wait, let's back up some days. Amazing time I had riding the bus across Canada, stopping and visiting with friends en route. Culminating with bright sunny days spent cycling, swimming and eating my way around Vancouver with three familiar faces from my Ottawa days last summer. As far as cities go, Vancouver gets me. Something about it fits like a real good pair of Birkenstocks.

Next I rode my bicycle all loaded up once again to Horseshoe bay, where I ferried my way across to Nanaimo, and was greeted by two super special Otesha friends who have been working real hard at their newly opened community bike shop: Hub City Cycles. I was so excited for them, and to see that indeed the bike co-op is becoming quite a hub in Nanaimo. After some great harvest soup, a walking tour of town and even a race around town on two wheels and down a waterslide or two, I soundly slept and woke early to ride 120km to Courtenay. Here I was greeted by both a friendly bicycle cafe as well a friendly cyclist herself, whom I was so graciously hosted by. We had an absolutely delicious dinner as we chatted about bicycle coalitions, touring and environmentalism. My new friend even rode me out of town the next day en route to Campbell River, the ferry port which would take me to Quadra island, and further on to Cortes the next day. I had one more wonderful stay with super generous people, from whom I loved hearing about adventures in homeschooling, bicycling in Mexico, life on small town Quadra island, and crafting and selling their handmade bicycles (Click here to see more about their company). 

Alas, October 1 came, and as a new month started, it was time for me to cycle home for the next month: Hollyhock education and retreat centre on Cortes Island. After some steep island hills and a bit of warm rain, some momentary confusion about why I'd  chosen  to come so far for something so unknown, oh, and a lot of almond butter, I arrived. And as soon as I met Andria, the volunteer coordinator, and she embraced me in a big hug, I felt that I had come to the right spot, purposefully, at the correct time. As I was set free to explore the property for the next few hours, and I saw the ocean, the unlimited tea bar, the hot tubs, the beautiful kitchen, the garden, I continued to feel at ease with my choice to come here. I met my fellow volunteers: 8 of us all bunking down in the same big house, all coming to Hollyhock  from our own worlds, varying in age between 22-60. Each person is so interesting and we've been sharing really meaningful interesting conversations about the experience of life. I've been asked tough questions and having my eyes opened bigger and wider.  

Besides all that I have been swimming in the invigorating sea, went on a couple hikes-one where I was bombarded and stung by wasps multiple times, I've cycled up and down the Cortesian hills, been to the Cortes Island market, made a local friend or two, I've stargazed and wandered in the garden, played frisbee and soaked in the hot tubs, meditated and practiced yoga, eaten so much delicious food; oh, and done lots of dishes, chopped some veggies, cleaned many rooms, and made many a pot of coffee and tea. 

Gratitude has been filling me up this past week, and it seems fitting since it is the time where many folks give thanks for the harvest, for the gift of love and life. I feel very lucky to be in this place of extraordinary abundance, where I can pick apples from trees, walk into the woods in ten steps, fill my belly full of nutritious food at each meal,  go within myself, and feel supported doing so, connect and learn from new friends, and be happy doing karma yoga through labour. 

As I return to the theme that I started with in this blog post about realizing your life purpose, a theme which I am sure I will continue to come back to time and time again over the next weeks, and a theme many people come to Hollyhock to explore the idea of, I offer you another quote that fits so well within my life at the moment:

"I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve (or save) the world and a desire to enjoy (or savor) the world. This makes it hard to plan the day"  EB White

The beautiful traveller's curse

I recently read a piece of writing that serves as a warning for young travellers, essentially that the beautiful world that they explore and the interesting life that they lead is cursed. Because the relationships formed are short lived and special, but not necessarily meaningful, and the more places you explore, seeking a place that is ideal for you, the less likely it is that you will find that place worth settling down in. And once you do decide to set roots, it's difficult for anyone close to you to truly understand the experiences you've had. The piece of writing did resonate with me as I continue to explore and travel - there is some truth to the words, but geez reality made me a bit sad too. 

These thoughts about finding a best fit place and developing meaningful relationships has definitely come about for me this summer in Ontario. I was back in Ontario after some beautiful experiences and travelling on the West Coast, Australia, New Zealand. I found myself concerned about how my most loved people have felt over the past year and how our relationships have managed to thrive, or connection dwindle. I have made some far reaching connections on different continents of the world, and I questions if a life is more full of beauty when you have shorter interactions/relations with people of a variety of lifestyles, ethos, worldviews, or is a life more full of beauty when you set roots deep and have connected meaningful relations with fewer people? 

I'm still working on a balance of those two...and always remind myself that 'not all those who wander are lost'. (I still don't know who wrote this piece I'm referring to but please read it here and let me know what you think by commenting on this post)

I do know that I had a completely blissful summer. Still making new connections with really amazing people and making efforts to fill every other moment up with re-connecting, catching up and expressing my love for the people I know I definitely enjoy being with, whom I want in my life well and truly into the future and who I feel I may have neglected while being away. 

Geez, August was just so lovely! After having oodles of family around and celebrating Kelly's wedding, I spent a super pleasing week in Toronto catching up with people I love and visiting places I love too. I celebrated one more relatives wedding and then set out on a canoe trip on the French River with a family of 5 and a new friend. In two canoes filled up to the brim with gear and food, we paddled leisurely, swimming often, playing games with the kids, setting up camp spots and cooking food, having beautiful fireside chats about all things but mostly working less and living more, building sustainable alternative, creative communities, re-aligning priorities, forgetting about expectations, and recognizing that life is just stories created by each of us. I was inspired to be a parent by the way this family is and re-inspired to be creative about what and how we work. 

After the excitement of the canoe trip, I got to visit my sisters liffle farm and also my new friends' urban farm in Guelph. I spent a scattering of a couple more awesome days in Toronto over the next weeks, then scooted out to the Shelter Valley Folk Festival; a calm yet positively energetic music and community festival where I put a workshop on for Otesha about electronics from cradle to grave, I sat in the sun and listened to great music, danced under the full moon, and spent great time with a few special people. Beyond the community of people involved in planning the festival, I was feeling pleasantly on the fringe of the folk fest, I headed on to the Otesha Projects training week for two small teams riding this September/October throughout Ontario. 

As I already knew, I am still very in love with The Otesha Project, and the feeling of home that each event brings about that I'm involved in. The people are silly, hopeful, generous, full of hugs, they're creative, interested and interesting. The same Otesha quirks exist year after year, team after team. I rode with the 7 members of the phenomenal food tour for the first 4 days of their journey, an amazing privilege to be a resource of any sort to the team as they built community, visited farms and preformed the Otesha play. 

And September continued to be special as I attended one more ritualistic right of passage for my long time dear friend Elysia, as she was married to her favourite person. A joyous time to be spent with some of my very longest friends. 

Alas, after these wonderful summertimes, another journey abounds. I'm west bound again; with my bicycle in tow, heading for Vancouver, then riding up to Cortez Island to do a volunteer internship at Hollyhock. And as I bus my way west across this beautiful (huge) country of ours once again, I continually reflect on my past experiences and lessons learn. I think a bit about what future days will bring and I always remind myself of my mortality. This here life is only once, so I'm going to try my very best to love living it and cherish each moment. 

like a zucchini flower

I'm just so lucky.

I just saw so much family come together, to welcome yet another couple members into the family. My sister celebrated her love this past weekend at the cottage that my dad built a few years back. I saw my sister so healthy and happy, how wonderful...and I boogied and danced under a beautiful tent that covered the cottage drive.

I feel so grateful for all the beauty that has been in my life these days. I am so lucky to be able to live the life that I have been this summer, and I continue to have such wonderful adventures to look forward to. Great Lakes Commons Lake Ontario Tour, Pedal to Plate Otesha Tour, spending delicious time with friends in Ottawa, reconnecting with so many at the Hillside Festival, spending time at my sisters new country home, reconnecting with so many family members, and spending fun quality time preparing for a super fun event, developing new relations, building on old. Meeting lovely new people and learning. always always learning. So much cycling, jogging, swimming, chatting, reading, re connecting, challenging myself...

I feel nervous now though, a strange sensation. Hoping that I can maintain balance, that I can remain grounded among all these wondrous things that are happening. Hoping that I am giving enough to those that I love, and taking time to develop relationships that could blossom and bloom. 

Blossom and Bloom. 

My heart.

My mind.

My soul. 

Blossom and Bloom.

Pedaling to see what's on my Plate

Bicycles. Food. Bicycles and Food. Bicycles, Love, Food. Love. Food. Bicycles. 

Once again, I was privileged to participate in an Otesha cycling Tour. This time, rather then a two month long cycling and performing tour to spread messages of hope, empowerment and environmental sustainability to students, we were embarking on a 9 day tour in the Ottawa area to visit mushroom farms, goat farms, grain farms, an abattoir, vegetable farms, organic and conventional, big and small. As a 14 person group the tour participants were discovering where some of their food really comes from, and engaging in discussions about food security, food sovereignty, and food choices. We had a diverse representation of a number of different ways to grow food, and also a diverse representation of how to treat food, how to appreciate it, and how to effect change in our visibly troubled food system where the reliance on outside inputs is extremely common. What does all this mean? It means interested people had interesting conversations about a number of topics like: 

Migrant agricultural labour. Exploitation of employees at farms. It's quite possibly true that without short term migrant labour on Canadian farms, we would not have food on tables at the farmers market or at the supermarket. Agricultural workers are often not paid minimum wage. Canadians seem generally to be unwilling to do the labour involved with farming. 

Aboriginal stories and connections with their food, and a bit about how that has been warped and changed by European influences. We had a wonderful guest from the Anishinabe (Ojibway) people, who shared traditional knowledge about how food has played a role and still plays such a large roll in his peoples life styles and traditions. 

Food sovereignty. Sometimes referred to as food security. 1 in 6 people are food insecure. 3/4 of these folks are women. 90% of those that are food insecure are the farmers themselves. Monsanto and Cargill are two companies that basically control the entire food systems, by controlling seed stocks. We had a great panel of folks together to talk about food security at the international level, and at the national level (with a representative from Food Secure Canada and Ram's Horn), as well as the local level (one of the farmers at Roots and Shoots described the food system through his local lens as he organically farms the land). Please do click on some of the embedded links in the former sentences, the reading potential is endless on these issues. 

Community Supported Agriculture is important to organic farmers. And boy do those farmers work freakin' hard. Exploitation ensues, even on these organic small scale farms. Because food prices in the grocery stores are artificially cheap, and those 'expensive' prices you see on farmers market food? Actually still way too cheap to provide appropriate compensation for growers. 

Growing food takes inputs, and its amazing when farmers can have a closed loop at their farm, operating with permaculture at the centre of their practices, where all inputs are supplied by the land that you live on. 

Consumption of animal products. If the meat animals are raised in an ethical, fair, healthful way, is is a sustainable and ethical choice to consume animal products? Animal protein does take more resources (think water, space, food) per kg to grow, compared to plant protein. More often then not, animals are farmed in commercial, large scale operations where inputs such as food, water, electricity, and medicines are used, and the animals are treated quite poorly. People have a disconnect with the animals life, and often don't feel as though they could actually kill the animals they so readily are able to eat. But, animal poop is quite important for nourishing soil, avoiding one stream of inputs from outside sources. 

and the list goes on...

As we spoke among the group and one on one, everyone did so with passion, interest, curiosity and attention. Each person in the group created a safe and comfortable environment for folks to feel comfortable expressing where they are at in the spectrum of where they were in terms of food system knowledge and opinion. It felt great, supportive, at the same time silly and fun. 

Along on the tour we had a videographer, in fact, an Otesha Olumni who I spent time with after my very first Otesha Tour. She created a number of short video blogs. Here are two of my favourite:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbcNcSXL6WU&list=UU4GBmpk1hLiSIgISkQ5gfJA&index=1&feature=plcp
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsiCXdsHO1s&feature=player_embedded

I'm still here in Ottawa, reveling in the post tour high, and also reconnecting with folks from last summer. Going for lots of bike rides, visiting swimming spots and farmers markets, cooking local yummies. It feels great, fun, hot, summery, fresh and old all at once. More on that later...


Love, Peace and bike grease always.